Tag / living sober

by Janet

CoLoReVolvE

It’s official.

The world revolves. Or is it evolves?

For the last four and one-half months, I can literally use my fingers to count the number of times I’ve left the house to do something fun, interesting, or worthwhile.

It wasn’t until the past month or so that the situation started to affect my mental state. I realize that this story is redundant to everyone, because it’s not just my story—it’s almost everyone’s story!

For those of us who are in recovery, this type of solitude, or isolation, is a slippery slope. A downward slide that can send us sailing down into the pit if we fail to remain diligent.

I feel fortunate, however, because I’m a die hard optimist and I’m not one who is prone to depression. Or giving up. On the other hand, I have caught myself thinking–lately—that NOTHING is exciting anymore. It’s hard to “feel.”

I’m like the girl in my coloring project, looking out at the world through a crack and everything that is beautiful and wonderful is OUT THERE. And I don’t know if I’ll ever get OUT THERE again.

With that negative mindset, the world looks black & white—it is colorless! But… (hopefully the image comparison works in the reader) if I change my mindset, and decide to use this time to evolve, the colors start to appear…

Things begin to excite me again! I realized that not only are these unusual and difficult circumstances an opportunity for growth, they are “the perfect” opportunity for growth.

Because… if it’s easy, it probably isn’t growth.

I learned to always take on things I’d never done before. Growth and comfort do not coexist.

Ginni Rometty, Chairman, President & CEO of IBM

What an awesome quote! I know that making my way through COVID quarantine hardly compares to becoming the first woman to head IBM, but what the heck. Maybe it does!

I can consider myself a victim, the underdog, a casualty of my circumstances—living in a world that is black and white—devoid of any color and excitement. OR I can consider myself a conqueror, the victor, a survivor of the fittest—and I can color my world… any damn way that I choose!

Thank you for reading… I hope you found something enjoyable or inspiring here!

The featured image is my third “coloring project” done in Adobe Illustrator (with effects added in Smart Photo Editor). The project took several days, maybe even a week, and the relaxation that I experienced while working on it was worth every second.

Peace & Love!
—Janet

by Janet

Gazing Upward

I saw this sunset a week ago, just before my Thursday evening class started. It was beautiful just the way it was, but I wanted to do something with it. I feel like I need a ‘creative reprieve’ more and more these days. Not that anything is going bad, or I am stressed out or anything; I just think that sitting down to get creative helps put a halt to my overthinking. It’s like wordless prayer. It forces me to be still.

So… I hit another ‘month’ anniversary; 2 years and 8 months sober as of yesterday. It’s not like I count the days or anything, but when I see the calendar hit the 7th each month I make a mental note—thinking about where I was then compared to where I am now. What a difference 977 days make!

Anyway, that’s about all for now. Have a beautiful day everyone! Remember to stop and smell the roses… enjoy a cup of coffee with a friend… or gaze up at a beautiful sunset.

Because when you stop and look around, this life is pretty amazing. Dr. Seuss

Life is good and God is great!!

by Janet

A Song in my Soul

What I have in my heart and soul — must find a way out. That’s the reason for music. Ludwig van Beethoven

Today has been such a good day! It felt like there was a little celebration going on inside of my soul, and I wanted to burst out in song! Believe it or not, I actually wrote that before I found the Beethoven quote. How perfect is that?!

I mentioned before that I was done apologizing or explaining what went wrong with my images, but I have to be honest and say that this design wasn’t exactly what I envisioned. I love the rust tones though, so I decided that it was time to call it finished. It’s funny, sometimes when people ask me what my favorite color is, I wonder if they think it’s strange when I tell them rust, or brown. I just love those earthy shades!

I used some clouds and an old moon shot to start it out because today I was able to withdraw from my Biology class (which was killing me!), and I found the perfect replacement course that starts in two weeks; Astronomy.

Instead of peering through a microscope at bacteria, I’ll be gazing up at the moon and stars! My soul has been singing all day!

Life is beautiful… and God is so, so good!

The earth has music for those who will listen. Reginald Vincent Holmes