Month / January 2022

by Janet

Bullseye

This evening, I was surprised to learn that bullseye is another idiom. Who knew? I had no idea until I was thinking about the words that could accompany my art. I started a Haiku, but it seemed too dull and old school for a somewhat contemporary illustration.

So, I googled “bullseye” and found it on theidioms.com (a site that I didn’t know existed until today), so I figured it might be fun to make bullseye my word of the month. We’re almost at month’s end anyway, so I won’t have to stick with it too long. Ha!!

Bull’s Eye

Meaning:

  • the center of a target
  • when an outcome is the best one possible
  • to be on point
  • to hit the center of a target successfully
  • get something exactly right, or be on target

According to my source, the word became associated with archers hitting a target in the 1880’s, when English yeomen tried to show off their expertise by shooting through the eye of a bull’s empty skull. It is also said that the black center of a target looks like the black of the eye of a bull, or the five-shilling coin that was commonly referred to as a “bull’s eye”.

Source: https://www.theidioms.com/bulls-eye/

I’m not sure where any further exploration of the word would take me, but what my illustration seems to say to me is that sometimes you can hit your mark without getting a bullseye. The fun is in the trying.

It’s not about winning or losing, it’s about playing the game.

That’s my two cents, anyway.

Until next time…
Peace & Love!

by Janet

Idioms: Part II

The Conclusion

A SHORT STORY
In case you missed it, here is Part I

Once in a blue moon things happen that surprise me. I figured there was a snowball’s chance in hell that he’d call. I mean, the kid was gorgeous and I was sure he had bigger fish to fry. So, imagine my surprise when the phone rang. I was on cloud nine.

I didn’t mince words either. I gave him my address and told him to come visit after work. It’d been a decade since I had dated, so I figured that ship had sailed. Needless to say I started feeling nervous, but I told myself to be cool… surely it’s like riding a bicycle. Things would all come back to me.

Well, when it rains it pours. The night was a disaster. Talk about the perfect storm. First, he showed up late, and I’m a real stickler about tardiness. He started sweet-talking me with excuses and apologies, and I told him that actions speak louder than words. 

We decided to call it a truce, and we sat down to get to know each other better. We had just met that morning, after all, so I gave him the benefit of the doubt. After some excellent conversation, he leaned over and kissed me softly on the cheek.

“You’re a sweet lady,” he said. “You remind me of my mother.”

Well, that was the last straw. My face turned red, my head started spinning, and I knew the night was going down in flames. I guess it’s not all his fault, it takes two to tango after all. I should have known the age difference was too extreme. I don’t even know what I was thinking… your guess is as good as mine.

“Obviously you’re not playing with a full deck,” I cried. “You don’t say that to someone you’re about to sleep with! Besides… you can’t judge a book by its cover, you know.”

“Are you off your rocker? He squealed as he opened the door, “I just wanted to talk!” 

The door slammed, rattling the pictures in my hallway as they always do. And there I was, sitting alone in my living room, lit only by candlelight, feeling like a fool.

After a night like that, I was certain that I’d wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. But I actually started the day in a good mood and I know that every cloud has its silver lining.

I put my foot in the shallow end and took a chance. It wasn’t the best date I’ve ever had, but it was a blessing in disguise. You know how the old saying goes, “no pain, no gain.” It’s like exercising… the more you do it, the easier it gets. I’m not as afraid as I was before, and I sure as hell know that there are other fish in the sea. Next time I’ll just be sure to look before I leap.

And check his ID.

Anyway, I think the key in this dating thing is patience… 

Slow and steady wins the race, and good things come to those who wait.

Until next time,
Stay blessed!

My featured image for Part I was a bit of an afterthought, and not really original, so I decided to use one of my own illustrations for Part II. I post things on Facebook from time to time, and I had posted this one there – but I’ve never shared it on the blog. I thought it would be perfect for the conclusion of my story. Although I’m not real sure it’s concluded yet. I have piles of idioms left, and my protagonist has a lot of life left in her!

Honestly, this has been a REALLY fun writing experiment. I thought I would share a link to the site that lists a bunch of idioms, in case anyone is interested in some idiom fun. I will say that it got me thinking!

Anyway, thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed!!

by Janet

A Bunch of Idioms:

And Other Lies I Tell Myself

A SHORT STORY

I’m not going to beat around the bush. It’s time to bite the bullet and get it out of my system.

To make a long story short… I was waiting in line at the grocery store this afternoon, minding my own business, and this old woman sneaks up behind me and yells “A penny for your thoughts!” 

She was barking up the wrong tree because pennies are my business. “A penny saved is a penny earned!” I shouted back at her. 

“Whoa, easy does it.” she exclaimed. “I was just trying to break the ice.”

I didn’t know what to say. I’d been feeling under the weather since morning, and to make matters worse, I was about to purchase a chicken that cost me an arm and a leg. I figured I’d better cut her some slack, because things tend to get out of hand quickly lately, what with the virus and all.

“Sorry,” I replied. “Please take it with a grain of salt. I’m just upset because I got out of the house late today, and you know what they say… the early bird gets the worm.”

“Hang in there,” she said. “You didn’t miss the boat. You’re here now, and it’s better late than never!” 

“You can say that again,” I replied. “And another thing that gets me is that I can’t believe how expensive this chicken is!” 

As she rested her hand on my shopping cart to help keep her from tipping over, the old woman leaned in and whispered, “Oh honey… don’t cry over spilled milk. Besides, didn’t your momma tell you that a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.”

I smiled and moved forward to set my items on the conveyor belt. As I reached for my eggs, the top came loose and the whole carton started to tumble. I hate the way they’re always cutting corners. Those egg cartons are so flimsy. I understand they’re trying to help the environment and all, but they need to go back to the drawing board. I mean, it’s not rocket science! 

Anyway, this handsome young bagging clerk came rushing around the cart, and would you believe that he managed to catch that carton in mid-air, just before it hit the ground? He was really on the ball!  

“Wow,” I said, batting my eyelashes in the most flirtatious manner, “That was a close call. Go figure, too, because normally I don’t put all of my eggs in one basket.

“You can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs.” he said, winking as he grinned. 

I decided to do something at the drop of a hat. “Would you care to join me for brunch?” I asked. My face felt flush and I knew that I’d bitten off more than I could chew. 

“Oh, sorry ma’am,” he answered. “I’m working all night, but I’ll take a rain check.”

I decided to throw caution to the wind. Handing him my business card, I purposely brushed my hand against his. “The ball is in your court.”

Wow, time flies when you’re having fun.

I need to hit the sack, but I’ll be back later to finish my story.

Until then,
Sleep tight!

To be continued…